4 questions to ask yourself before moving forward in a relationship

You've been talking to this girl for awhile now. She seems to like you a lot. You definitely like her and you want to move forward, but how the do you know when it is time to move forward? 

Here are 4 questions to ask yourself before moving forward in a dating relationship:

 

How long have you guys known each other?

 

Because duh. If you met them today that's something to keep in mind. Sometimes it feels like you've known them forever, but take a second and think about how long it has actually been. 

 

Have you been hanging out in different environments? 

 

AKA, do you guys always go out to eat on dates, or do you do things more in line with who you are as a person? I would suggest doing some other stuff besides eating and watching movies together. The Superstition Mountains are AWESOME. Try taking a hike- plus you get the benefit of seeing what your date looks like in the daylight.

Or if you're more of a "stop and smell the roses" kind of a guy, you could take a stroll through the Mesa Community College Rose Garden https://rosegarden.mesacc.edu/rosegardenatmcctours.html
It's a public garden open 24/7! Whatever you do on your dates, learn more about each other so you see more than how they treat your server at the restaurant. You can see how they treat other people, if they enjoy nature, etc.

If you're super into something (like quilting or playing video games) invite your date to join you for a class or a lesson on those things. You can learn a lot about someone when you see them in different settings.

 

Have you seen her in her own environments? 

Do you know her friends, where she works, what she does for fun, etc. and how she behaves in those different settings? Ask her if she has any specific hobbies she'd like to share with you. Maybe she's really into watching chef shows and re-creating gourmet meals. See what you can learn about her by her routines and what she enjoys doing. Take the opportunities to get to know her friends and hang out in groups. Not only is it fun, but you'll gain so much knowledge from it! You can see the role that she takes on with her different friends and the different parts of her personality will show up. Be open to trying new things together and take notice of how she acts. When is she most in her element? Do you find yourself attracted to her then? 

 

What do you guys have in common, and what is way different?

What kind of church does she go to? What does she do for fun? What schedules do you guys have? What are her big dreams and do they clash with yours? What is her involvement with her family? These are just good things to know. Remember- differences are not deal breakers, but it is good to go into a relationship with knowledge. 

 

After asking yourself these questions- what's the feel you get? If your head is spinning with what you don't know, then take the time to find these things out. If you've got a good grasp on most of these issues and you feel like you haven't seen any red flags yet, then prepare yourself for your "next step" or as we used to call it the "DTR" conversation- and enjoy it, who knows? It could be your last one! 

 

Until next time- take care,

~Molly

P.S. If you want to talk with someone about this stuff- shoot me a text: (480) 771-0942 I'd love to help!